Not your Cross to Carry!

I had a thought this morning while running 100meter dashes with a 15lb barbell, just part of my work for the morning… Well let me back up. I have been doing CrossFit Loveland for the past 5 weeks. If you haven’t heard of CrossFit watch the video at the bottom. I have been doing CrossFit for several reasons…

• I am morbidly obese (as the Dr.’s say)
• I have tried bootcamps –> Weight Watchers –> HCG –> Dieting –> Gym Membership to no avail!
• It kicks my butt ever single time & I feel amazing afterwards
• I’m seeing results
• I’m feeling confident
• The community & encouragement is like nothing I have experienced before
• It’s a focus on overall fitness, not just my gut, or my muscles, it’s everything!
• At 321 lbs at 28 something had to give!!!

That last one is the kicker for me. I have always been a big guy. Always! I’m Broad shouldered so will probably always be ‘stocky’ but I have always been large. Low 200′s in High school to mid 200′s in college, to low’s 200′s in Northern Ireland, to now in the healthiest state in the US & with in 5 years of moving here weighing around 215lbs I have put on 100lbs! What gives???

1st and foremost horrible eating habits. The stress of ministry plays a factor, but ministry doesn’t make me go grab 20nugs from McDonalds & a large fry & Coke. Ministry may take a lot of time & make things more complex in figuring out when & how I can go work out, but it is on the lower reasons. My eating habits suck! To many lunch meetings & not great choices!

I would say 2ndly & possibly the most important when I actually think about it… I don’t take Gods love for me & desire for me to have a ‘full abundant life in Him” (John 10.10) Serious! Nor do I take serious the fact that He has made my body to be good & a temple pleasing to Him. I have made excuses my whole life as to why I’m fat, I’ve ignored the sinful behavior that perpetuates the weight. Is being unhealthy & overweight a sin? If there is something you can do about I feel it is. I’ve lived it!

If you are overweight and reading this hear me please, as a big guy myself I am not trying to attack or make you feel like crap, but in looking at the love & truth of God I can take His grace & mercy for advantage & not try to live a healthier (less heavy) lifestyle for Him, for my family, for my church, for my community… for me!

So what ‘gave’? A number of things I guess. I got tired of making excuses! I got tired of struggling to buckle my freaking pants! I mean really! I got tired of flying in an airplane and wondering if I would have to ask for an extender seat belt… I mean you can jump rope with the 1st one!!! I got tired of mentally feeling that each time I get up to share Gods hope for peoples lives that people can’t possibly take me seriously because my weight tells them a different story of hope. Hear me on this, I am my hardest critic I know. No one has ever said anything to me about this or anything like it, even though it may have been for my betterment. But the way I’ve been living isn’t life, and more importantly this isn’t the kind of cross God has called me to bear, nor is it for you!!!

So back to my 100meter dashes carrying a barbell. As that cold bar straddled my back this morning & my trainer had me going back forth he instructed me to take some time to pray & ask God about thoughts of our next steps with planting DayBreak Church (click here for more information). As I was running & praying I saw my shadow with the bar across my back & was reminded of Jesus carrying the cross, the cross he was nailed to & died on for the sins of all people! Then the thought came to the cross we are also called to bear. I’m not sure if you have ever had God speak to you, whether audibly, through another person, through a feeling, emotion or what ever, but in that moment I felt a powerful word and thought hit me

This is not the cross I desire for you to bear!

I felt that I have made my weight a burden, a cross that I’m called to bear. And well honestly it has been one. I’ve made it a cross and in that I have made it a distraction. God never intended for the cross I bear to be unhealthy eating habits or being over weight. That stuff is merely sin, baggage, and baggage that is meant to be dropped off and left.

I want to bear the cross of caring for my family & loving through the hard times, I want to bear the cross of loving a city in need of Jesus… not the cross of high blood pressure, swollen ankles, jeans not fitting, hard breathing from sitting up in a chair (haven’t got that yet). The bearing of a cross is not about us, it’s about Jesus, it’s about the beauty of tomorrow, it’s more than overcoming, it is embracing Him who overcame!

I felt burdened to write this, to encourage those of you out there who are struggling with weight, or struggling with something/anything that keeps you from the hope of tomorrow! God has more for you than this! I have made 28 years of poor choices that have lead me to here, and not even 28 days will get me to a healthier place, but it is a start. My hope is that you too can take a good hard look and ask yourself, “Is this really the cross I’m called to carry?” If it is about you, probably not! If it is a short sighted thing, probably not! If it is a mistake in your life, probably not! The cross leads to life! Dig deep my friends & experience the Good Life, the Greater Life today!

I am reminded today God has something so much more in store for me and of others around me, for a city even! I am glad my soul is waking up to this truth “You matter! Get it in gear! It’s time to make a difference!”

As promised… the video…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_QUJlRdy-4

Making an impact?

Feeling the need to dust some things off in my life. One of which is this blog. I find that taking time to be disciplined enough to write and ask questions here I am disciplined in other areas, my creativity goes up, and my over all functionality increases as well.

As a ‘soon to be’ church planter in Kenosha, WI. I have been praying and thinking a lot about impact (positive and negative) on peoples lives and a community. Here is a question I am pondering… leave your thoughts as well questions I should ponder…

Question: If you were given $10,000 to make an impact in the life of others/community what would you do

Friday Five: Why I Love Association of Related Churches

My wife and I have begun a journey into planting a church in South Eastern Wisconsin about this time next year into the fall. It has been an incredibly fast ride so far. We said yes to this journey about two months ago and it has been like drinking from a fire hose from God and his provision.

This last week I was in Birmingham, Alabama at the Church of the Highlands with 105 other potential church plant pastors. We were at a training with the group known as ARC (Association of Related Churches). From the late nights conversing with others and early mornings have my brain melted by some incredibly practical thoughts I was very blessed by this trip. I wanted to simply share 5 things really excited me about this time away.

• Partnership – This is possibly one of the biggest realizations in that there are others with the same passions and desire to see people come to know God in a deeper life giving way. Not being alone more importantly means I don’t have to do this alone.
• Practical systems – I am systems guy. Systems plus Holy Spirit equals intentional ministry being done. ARC gives some of the best practical systems that make sense and easy to implement.
• Proven success – We go to hear from other pastors who are following the model and teachings and with a 95% success rate of planted churches after 5 years That gives me some grounded confidence in this group.
• Passionate for God’s Kingdom – ARC doesn’t have really any affiliation with a denomination, but what i have heard/felt and sensed is their dedication to building up God’s kingdom, not adding to a denominational statistic. As pastor Chris Hodge (one of the founding members of ARC) communicated to us “God will give you a supernatural love for the city”. Was refreshing to be around people who were more concerned about the collision of Gods Kingdom with the cities we were going to be going to.
• Powerful vision – There is a boldness that comes from this group that empowers me and helps me refocus. ARC has a powerful vision to plant life giving churches that plant life giving churches. This vision to not simply shotgun into a town and saturate it with God’s word and hope people come, but a vision that reaches the hearts of the people and is life giving to them in a world that is so life taking.

It was a great week, met some amazingly driven new friends and set ablaze to join this group and learn more from them.

If you want to keep up with what is going on with our church plant you can click here to sign up for our newsletter.

You can also click here to read our latest newsletter

Big News!

It has been a long time since I have even logged into this blog. It isn’t for the lack of wanting to that is for sure. There has been much consuming my wife & I’s hearts & minds as of May 24th. On that day, Stacie & I began the conscious conversation of asking the “big what if” question in our lives for what God may have in store for us next.

A what if that isn’t what most youth pastors or associate pastors ask. It isn’t a question a couple asks when they just built a house, both have incredible jobs and amazing freedom to do what they love. But for the past year we have been entertaining the thought of starting a church… Not news we share lightly. Yep you read that right. We have been praying through thoughts of starting/planting a church. News we share with excitement but down right crazy fear of what is next for sure. The journey we have been from last November to May 24th, into June 2nd (they day we said yes) and July 3rd (the day we began movement in telling our current staff & leadership) has been a very incredible one. One that I could only say is prophetic in sorts.

I will be transitioning this blog into sharing some of those thoughts about planting a church along the way of this journey. The best way to keep up to date is to click here to sign up for our newsletter. It will have prayer needs, ways of joining our team, and answering questions some might have.

You can also head over here to check out the website, my good buddy Matt Cleaver set up for us.

There are many details, way to many for this particular post. All that we can say is that there is a new day bursting forth from the Lord for us, and a gathering of people who will come together to praise God for the new life He gives. We are excited to say the least and can’t wait to see all that God teaches us through this journey with Him and others.

Unfair or Unsafe…

So as I was driving home yesterday from a long day at church I saw 4 teenagers standing on a corner holding up a sign for a fundraiser they were doing for ____________. You can fill in the blank cause the kids are there for everything, youth groups, cheer camps, choirs & bands, school fundraiser. I see this a lot. It is not an unusual thing at all, and in fact our student ministry has done it as well.

What got me thinking this about this more was that this particular corner last week my wife and I pulled over to help a young pregnant teenager. She had wording written on a piece of paper in a spiral notebook. We stopped to hear her story and see how we could help. As we pulled in a cop pulled in a few minutes after us asking us to leave and the girl to move along. At the time we didn’t think anything about it but seeing these ‘more well off’ kids standing on the same street corner asking for money caused me to ask…

What is the difference here?

I know we have a panhandler and then you have a fundraiser… but why is one who is in need forced to move on, while others who are desiring something more (new skirts, new trumpets, new shoes, bus to go on a mission trip) they can wave their signs and get hand outs.

I’m not sure how I feel, but the big Justice filled Gospel question comes into my mind and makes me wonder, why is one ok and the other is not.

What are you thoughts?

Restless Nights!

Restless nights don’t come to me all that often but when they do it drives me crazy. They are nights where my brain will not shut off. Rarely am I everything thinking of anything of real substance, but I can’t figure out why I can’t shut it off.

The past few nights have been Restless nights for me. Last night I finally began to listen. Those moments are normally indicators from your body or soul trying to get your attention. I finally was able to quiet myself enough to hear God saying, “HEY!!!! I want to talk to you.” Have you ever been on such an autopilot mode that you even those little God interruptions seem like turbulence that is meant to be overcome?

We can become so streamlined that we need those restless moments to make things uneasy, to cause us enough discomfort that we take the journey off of autopilot and reengage with our selves and Jesus.

Last night I was reminded just how much Jesus wants to speak to me, how much he wants to be involved in my day in day out happenings. The moment I become to tired and worn out, the moment I hit autopilot and just start coasting is the moment I leave him out of the picture.

If you experience restless nights, or restless days, take heed to ask your soul, “Is something wrong?” I have found that in these moments my soul is trying to tell me something, and I need to clear the calendar to listen to it, to take time and be with God a little more intentionally today that normal.